Character Interview with Colonel Nicholas Throckmorton

Nick,GuanshiChina,1944

Nick,GuanshiChina,1944

1.      Ok, Let’s start with the basics. Can you tell me your name and rank?

         Nicholas Throckmorton, Colonel, USAAC, USAF retired.

2.      Where are you from?

  Born: Buffalo, NY.  From: all over.

3.      What’s the most flattering thing anyone has ever said about you?

I enjoyed a relationship with British field officer in Hong Kong during the world war.  Patricia was big-busted dame, worked in logistics, was not afraid of anything, anybody, or stepping on any toes.

She told me: “Just like you said, Nick, you were right: ‘If the Japs don’t kill us, then the whiskey will … and if whoring is illegal … then we’re all going to die young and lonely.’ … Then making love becomes a damn sin.  Fück it.  Let’s hit the sheets.”

At the time, that made sense to me.  It was hot and sticky in China that summer.  Real sticky, despite the bourbon and clean sheets.

4.      What’s your idea of a good lover?

A good lover is honest.  And warm.  Keeps a secret or two for you.  And don’t give a damn about what other people think.  Trusts you.  And likes to screw at any opportunity.  And recognizes the distinctive click of the safety release on a 25 caliber Beretta.

5.      What is the pet name for the love of your life?

Joey … Jovita.  She is Puerto Rican. El Español es la lengua amorosa.

6.      What is your biggest fear?

Without a doubt.  Fire.

7.      Is there anything you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t done? (Why haven’t you done it?)

I tried for years to find my older brother Leopold.  He and his gal Phryne ran from the Black Hand mafia.  I never found out what became of them.  It took me awhile to realize the deaths of our mother and three sisters wasn’t his fault.

8.      What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done to someone? Why?

Taking into consideration who I worked for, I don’t think you want the complete answer to that question.  So let it be enough to say that it happened in a hell-hole adobe prison in the Yucatan.  It stunk like sweat, rotting flesh and death.  I got out.  They didn’t.

9.      Here is the can of whip cream I promised you. What are you planning on doing with it?

Give it to the kid standing in the hallway with the Hostess Twinkie.  Maybe he’ll keep his mouth shut. He’s been standing there motionless for ten minutes.

10.  If you had complete and total control over anyone what would you have them do?

Shower, Jovita.  Shave.  Wear that white silk blouse, green pencil skirt, smoke stockings and heels.  We’ll tango.

11.  You seem a little tense. Is something bothering you?

It’s that kid in the hallway with the Twinkie.  He’s starting to play with himself.  I think he peeked under your dress and knows you’re bald.

 Shit….

12.   Where can we find out more about your life?

 All three Throckmorton family sagas are available at Amazon.com (Paper and eBook)

~ You may contact Author Edward R Hackemer at 1954packard@gmail.com ~

 **Mr. Hackemer is willing to provide Free PDF copies for anyone interested in leaving an honest review.**

A Bridge to Cross, In a Cream Packard, The Katydid Effect

A Bridge to Cross, In a Cream Packard, The Katydid Effect

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